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E D I T O R I A L S

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Growing Up Conservative

Tawny Smith July 16, 2017

I've wanted to write on this topic for awhile now... but have continually shied away from it.

Recently, I attended a fashion event and was just networking. I happened to meet someone through a friend I attended the event with and somehow, we got on the topic of the type of person I was, I mentioned that I was religious and he stopped me. He asked are you 100% religious or 100% faith. I didn't really understand his question, but I responded "well I 100% love Jesus so..." He then responded, "Okay so you're faith driven, there is a difference between religion and faith..." at which I acknowledged that he was completely right. He then made a comment that got me thinking, he said, "I just wasn't sure based off of the way you were dressed, you know, since you're showing so much skin." I was wearing high waisted bell bottom pants, and a cropped halter top which allowed for my shoulders and a part of my midriff to show.

Like I said, this topic has been on my heart for awhile, but it wasn't until this particular conversation happened, that it fueled the fire for me to actually write it.

If you know me, you know that I absolutely love Jesus Christ, without a doubt. I love my church, I love serving in the house in multiple different ministries, and I love walking in the presence of the Spirit everyday. My relationship with God has never been as deep and on track as it is right now. So the fact that my faith, religion, love for God, whatever you want to call it, was momentarily questioned because of how I was dressed, honestly boggled my mind.

Yes, I have been raised conservative, and yes, I do have many conservative beliefs. But you know what I also have? A desire in my heart to create. And where else would that desire have come from other than our Creator Himself? God is the ultimate artist, the ultimate creative. So why do other creatives get looked down upon for wanting to create something beautiful too? Why is it that I can't be a "good and righteous person" if I want to create a work of art that may not line up with other people's standards of what being a good little church girl should look like?

God gave me an artistic mind, and an artistic heart. I know I am not the only creative out there that has struggled with this! For so long I was afraid to create the things that were in my heart because I feared what other people would think or say. I was worried I would get asked to step down from serving at church because of the things I posted, or scared that I would't be seen as fit to mentor all of my amazing young girls that I lead a small group for. But now, I am done being afraid. Some of you may see these pictures and think they are inappropriate, but this is my art. These are the things that set my soul on fire.

There is a poem by Rupi Kaur that says, 

"Your art is not about how many people like your work, your art is about if your heart likes your work, if your soul likes your work, it's about how honest you are with yourself and you must never trade honesty for relatability."

After seeing this quote, I decided to stop holding myself back creatively because of what other people's opinions might be. If I live in fear of what others may think, I will never reach my full potential. I went to God with this, because I always want to choose His way over my way, and I found that I have no conviction for continuing down this path. God inspires my creativity and He has done nothing but pushed me forward even when I have felt like giving up.

I got tired of all of the surface level pictures and experiences, my heart needed something more. And once I discovered and experienced an emotional connection to a photo shoot that I loved, I have had a hard time going back to the surface level "blog posts."

So this is what I have decided... I still love blogging and will continue to do so! I really do enjoy it. Therefore, "My Style" and the other categories on my blog will remain what they are. But I have decided that my "Editorial" category will now be where my art can go. This category of my blog will be where I share my soul and my passions, this part of the blog... is for me.

And there is nothing wrong about that.

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Photos x RossV Visual Art & Photography

← My CircleIn With The New →

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Mood: when you’re exhausted from all the tea but still wanna sip. 👀☕️ ⁣
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Thanks @nickostlund for a fun time! Always love shooting with you! 🤍 I love it when I get a text asking if I’m down to create some art! Cause the answer is always gonna be YES! Any excuse I can get to go off and be creative with another creative soul, I’m gonna take. 🌾⁣
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Thanks @brookenalani for yet anot An ode to summer...⁣
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Where the @$&!? are you??? This Washington rain has gotta stop. 😩⁣
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Also, swipe to see the $7k ring I got to wear for this shoot. 👀 I’m surprised Rachel trusted me with it! ⁣
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Photographer & Coordinator: @rach If you’re looking for a good company to spend some money with, @giftofhopehaiti is the way to go. Here’s why:⁣
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▫️woman owned business⁣
▫️black owned business⁣
▫️gorgeous quality jewelry⁣
▫️their founding non-profit organization helps br If you’re participating in #blackouttuesday today, REMOVE all hashtags related to the Black Lives Matter hashtag so that people can still use those hashtags to get the information that they need! #blackouttuesday⚫️ #blackouttuesday⚫️✊🏻✊🏼✊🏽✊? Cooking up another collaboration with @brooke.embree and I am soooo excited. 👀⁣
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Yay for creative outlets and a community of people who get just as excited as you do about shoots! 🤍 ✨GIVEAWAY TIME✨⁣
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@itstashhaynes has been doing some crazy giveaways all month and this one is EXTRA exciting (in my bias opinion) cause it includes ME! 😜⁣
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Win a 2 hour content creation photo shoot with @ikeandtash PLUS all digital files and vide Kannon Cruz! Happy birthday my sweet little dude. Can’t believe you’re 4. You have such a fun and goofy personality and have brought so much light to all our lives. Love you so so much baby brother. 💙 Everyday is self care day when you’re in quarantine! 💁🏼‍♀️⁣⁣
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My go to pampering checklist:⁣⁣
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✨ bubble bath⁣⁣
✨ candles⁣⁣
✨ face mask⁣⁣
✨ @tendskin.usa ⁣⁣
✨ and the most important 🍷 ⁣⁣
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What’s on your “treat yo self&rd Heyyyy. How’s everyone doing? Bored like me? I’m at the level of I just bought purple hair dye bored. 👀 
Sooo don’t mind me if my hair suddenly falls out cause I have no clue what I’m doing. 🥴

Styling & Creative Directing Account

Blessed to have been able to work with so many beautiful black women over the years and I wanted to shout some out! ✨⁣
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This is Monique. This girl right here is passionate!!! Passionate about life, about food, about standing up for what’s righ Quarantine has me blowing the dust off of some goodies from the archives. 💨 Do we mind if I get honest for a second? No? Cool. Moving has been hard. I miss creating and working with the community I had back in WA. I miss having friends who were down to create on whim and having a consistent outlet to express myself. It&rsquo “The ocean is all I want to be. Beautiful, mysterious, wild and free.” “You used to touch me like you never felt a thing...” “pickin’ wings off of angels has always been my religion...” I get to see this little queen in a week! 💛 can’t wait to see my girls! @itstashhaynes 
p.c. @ikeandtash 
styling & creative direction: @by.thechicchameleon 
model: @lifewithwisdom 
mua: @ouikayla You need silence
 to find magic in spaces ✨

p.c. @rachelsyrisko 
styling & creative direction: @by.thechicchameleon 
model: @seth.greek 
m.u. @lexneelymakeup This is Ella. Please zoom in on her ridiculously beautiful eye balls. 💗 Tarzan.
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p.c. @rachelsyrisko 
styling & creative direction: @by.thechicchameleon 
model: @seth.greek 
makeup: @lexneelymakeup

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